A lot has happened in the past year.
The world stopped. Then kind of started back again and then stopped again. Thankfully for us it’s about to be fully opened back soon but for many countries they are now experiencing the worst of it. Poor them.
2020 started off as the best year ever. Home for carnival, finally a break and some help with my child – best time ever. Then we left Trinidad and flew straight into I Am Legend. I couldn’t find pasta for WEEKS. My child who lived on pasta would have starved to death if my mother didn’t send us food from amazon – boxes and boxes of rice and other packaged goods. Truly, how do mothers just always seem to save you from life? Because no groceries had any pasta, rice, pop tarts, nappies, hand wash, canned goods….you know, our essentials. It was WEIRD and scary seeing shelves and shelves of emptiness. Empty streets. I was afraid to go outside because all I could picture were those zombies and prayed that there was a UK Will Smith who’d save us if they did end up hunting us down.
It was scary times. My au pair had to go back to Spain because borders were closing. So I got a new au pair who solemnly declared that she was staying in the UK through the pandemic then after a week also went back to Spain. Liar. So I had no childcare. What did I do? Well what would you have done? I thanked God for my credit card, gave it a kiss and bought a flight for a younger cousin of mine (20 years silly) to come to England to be my au pair. No details required but I cannot describe how badly that turned out and urge anyone who thinks of doing this to never ever do this. But I do have a question- What happened to the younger generations? No but like really… what happened to them? I’ll stop there.
You know when you’re driving and there is traffic so you switch lanes to the obviously faster lane and then suddenly it becomes the much slower lane or even just stops completely? That’s what happened to me with work. I left a really busy out of control clinic because my quality of life was just not cutting it and started at a quiet clinic. The quiet clinic. It was nice for a few months and just as I felt my skills starting to deteriorate, things picked up and we got busier which was great. Then suddenly, likely due to the 3 million pets that were bought in the UK during lockdown, we became absolutely mind blowingly inundated with cases and I realised that what everyone says is true. I am a total shit magnet. I also blame COVID but mainly my shit magnet. It’s probably time to stop blaming COVID for every single thing that annoys us though.
“My dog is overdue his vaccine by 6 years – damn COVID”
“I’ve put on 3 stone – damn COVID”
“I’ve been single for 5 years probably because of social distancing – damn COVID”
…COVID has done a lot of things but it might be time to regain a little bit of self blame. These things are definitely our fault and I have definitely heard people say all of them. Not that COVID deserves anyone’s sympathy.
Anyway, work is exciting and we are all so challenged and stimulated mentally however having 13 in patients, 7 coming in and 5 waiting to be seen at any one point in time doesn’t feel great, feels like you want to run away to a far away land and just stay there. Alone. Forever. But like many PTSD moments (my go-to example is giving birth), the trauma blocks out some of our memory and we skip right back to work after the week of tears and questioning whether we are good enough to even keep doing this. There we go, adrenaline buzzing, excited to see what the night brings and to catch up with our colleagues who we saw only 7 hours ago and are now all on the same menstrual cycles because we spend so much damn time together and are all female and we hope it isn’t “that” time of the month because imagine that. It’s just great lol. Honestly working out of hours brings a whole new perspective to life and people and there is a total lack of ability to describe how outrageous so many situations are for us but that’s the beauty of it. When it’s all over at 9am the night team, looking pale and sick, share a smirk that its over and only your team can understand that joy as you exit the clinic relieved to leave the day team behind – who walk into clean (most of the time) quarters, not knowing that just an hour ago there was blood on the ceiling and the table and the walls and the floor and in our hair and on our shoes and that there was shit on someone’s boob. The unspoken stories of the night shift.
Pubs have been open since April once they have an outdoors bit which has been total and absolute GLORY. Would be even better if you can actually get a booking because everything is booked up forever now. Everyone is out in their best outfits just so HAPPY to be outside. The sun is shining every so often like typical fickle English weather but no one cares because at least they aren’t locked up in their zoos anymore. Poor zoo animals – we should really, really be changing the way zoo’s are constructed but that’s a whole other controversial topic in itself which we won’t get into right now.
Also since coming back into this strange world of COVID, we moved THREE TIMES. Obviously each one of those moves comes with it’s own drama but again I won’t get into it too much. Everything that has happened, did so for a reason and right now I am in a beautiful flat on a beautiful street with a beautiful new family that’s mine-all-mine.
And that’s probably the last thing to report about the past year.
Oh, and I got married. In secret. On April fools ha!